BONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 16! 090.- THE PINK PANTHER STRIKES AGAIN (1976, KINO LORBER 4K UHD). Also streaming on AMAZON PRIME, TUBI, PLUTO, ROKU TV, YOUTUBE.
We've reached the summit. If you ever stop someone on the street and casually ask him/her 'What is the best 'Pink Panther' movie ever made?' and he/she responds 'Why, obviously it's 1976's 'The Pink Panther Strikes Again,' duh!' then you know you've made a friend for life. 😁 It's never happened (and will never happen) to me, but diehard fans of the series tend to agree. This is the madcap, live-action cartoon feature Blake Edwards was building up to before, and it's the one he (and decades later Steve Martin) tried to emulate but never matched, let alone surpassed. Continuing where 1975's "Return of..." prequel left off, it's been three years since former Chief Inspector Dreyfus (Herbert Lom) was institutionalized for losing his mind as he tried to kill now-Chief Inspector Clouseau (Peter Sellers). After a brief meeting at the sanitarium that snaps him completely, Dreyfus escapes the hospital and tries to dynamite Clouseau's apartment just as manservant Cato (Burt Kwouk) and the inspector are wrecking it. Then Dreyfus turns super villain, kidnapping a scientist and threatening the world with a death ray (color pink) that'll wipe cities/landmarks unless the governments of the world agree to kill Clouseau. Oh, and the Pink Panther diamond isn't even mentioned... or missed. 😏
It's a shame that the funniest and most entertaining 'PP' movie (Clouseau-as-dentist-in-disguise giving Dreyfus the laughing gas still makes me cry from laughing so hard! 🤣😂) came as a result of the estrangement between Sellers (emotionally and physically frail after suffering multiple strokes) and Edwards, who by the end of production weren't even talking to one another. Lom has always been a reliable supporting foil to Sellers' comedic shtick, and this chance to become a full-on heavy (complete with castle lair, "Phantom of the Opera" organ and Dracula-like cape) elevates the silliness to absurd levels. Most importantly, "... Strikes Again" manages to start strong, then top the previous gag, then proceeds to keep topping itself until the very end. No other "PP" before or since can claim that. This is also where Henry Mancini caps his musical feathers by composing 'The Inspector Clouseau' theme that, combined with my favorite scene in the series (Jacques trying to cross a moat to Dreyfus' castle), delivers comedy gold.😅🤭 Omar Sharif has a wordless cameo as an Egyptian assassin that, pretending to be Clouseau, bangs a Russian assassin (Lesley Anne-Down's Olga) so good she turns into a love-smitten groupie... which the actual Clouseau benefits from without ever knowing why Olga has the hots for him. God, I love this movie. 😍🥰
ANIMATED INTRO OPENING: 4.75 NODS TO JULIE ANDREWS' 'SOUND OF MUSIC' ROLE (out of five). The 2nd and last Richard Williams-produced opening continues the homages to classic Hollywood (King Kong, Chaplin, "Singing in the Rain," etc.), but falls slightly short of the prequel's masterpiece intro. By contrast, the ending credits' gag going from the end of the live action to an animated pitch-perfect parody of "Jaws" is easily the best ending to a 'PP' movie ever made.
MOVIE RATING: 5 DEEP ROYS TOSSED AROUND LIKE RAG DOLLS BY DRUNKEN GERMANS DURING OKTOBERFEST (out of five).
'SOMETHING NEW, SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING... YADDA, YADDA, YADDA' FREE-FOR-ALL! 091.- NIGHTBEAST (1982, TUBI). Also streaming on PLEX, FAWESOME, CINEVERSE.
Nothing like a Don Dohler low-budget sci-fi flick to cleanse the palette. Building on his 1979 "Alien Factor" pedigree (same non-professional actors, vehicles, houses-as-hospitals, etc.), "Nightbeast" ups the ante by crash-landing a single alien somewhere in rural Maryland. This is one mean SOB creature that dismembers and/or laser-blasts many civilians (including children) before the local sheriff (Tom Griffith) and his female deputy get a chance to fight back. Special effects are surprisingly decent, especially the "Star Trek"-worthy 'poof' when a laser turns a person into disco particles.😅 'B' plots about an a-hole mountain biker (Don Leifert) murdering his girlfriend and the mayor refusing to close the town share screentime with the most awkward, non-p@rn sex scene ever filmed in Maryland! 😱🫣All that, plus the first production credit ever for J.J. Abrams as music composer. Feel free to blame the eventual downward spiral of the newer "Trek" and "Star Wars" franchises under J.J.'s direction on Don Dohler hiring young Abrams to work on this entertaining little flick. 3.5 SEXY WHITE MAN AFROS (out of five).
Love Dohler! Regional filmmaking at its finest. My favorite of his beside ALIEN FACTOR is 1991's BLOOD MASSACRE. Check it out! And don't blame Dohler for Abram's missteps-- while JJ follows Hollywood's capitalistic manifesto and merely pumps out product, Don brings all his passion to his projects, which is why they're so enjoyable.
Spoiler alert: I'm going to rank the newest Steven Spielberg theatrical release much lower than the Don Dohler space flick I just reviewed. It's all about expectations. Dohler's "Nightbeast" lived up to what I expected from his limited talent/resources, while "Disclosure Day" fails to come anywhere near the wonder or spectacle that Spielberg has delivered before JUST in the alien movie sub-genre ("Close Encounters...," "E.T.," "War of the Worlds," etc.), let alone his complete filmography. It's also lethargic in pace (I felt every single one of its 145 minutes piling on), has a weak leading man in Josh O'Connor (although Emily Blunt evens things out), is badly-written (by Spielberg, and that's after David Koepp polished the screenplay), and has a resolution so weak it made the actions by the characters getting there seem redundant. If henchman Casper (Henry Lloyd-Hughes) is so convinced Margaret and Daniel are such a threat to humanity he must kill them by ramming their car into an incoming train... he wouldn't toss his hands and walk away from the anchor desk just because bossman Noah (Colin Firth) has given up. He'd take the shot right in front of him! 😡😖This and "The Fablemans" prove that Spielberg should have retired while he was still on top ("Bridge of Spies"?). 2 INVISIBLE FIRETRUCKS SPLASHING ON STREET PUDDLES (out of five).
093.- AMERICAN SAMURAI (1992, FAWESOME). Also streaming on XUMO PLAY, MOMENTU+, FREE MOVIES.
Director Sam Firstenberg and Cannon-produced ninja movies were a heavenly match in the 1980's. By the early 90's Cannon was on its last legs, but that didn't stop Firstenberg from trying to do for samurai what he'd done with ninjas. Starring David Bradley ("American Ninja 3/4") and Mark Dacascos in his feature-film debut, "American Samurai" starts as a tale of two brothers (one a baby white boy that fell from the sky inside a toy airplane! 😂🤩) trained by their father (Michael Dudikoff's sensei in OG "American Ninja") in the art of samurai. Grown-up Bradley honors his adopted father's teachings, while Dacascos spits on them and becomes a yakuza soldier. Teamed up with a sexy reporter (Valerie Trapp), Bradley travels from America to Turkey and eventually ends up taking part in a weapons-based, "Bloodsport"-type kumite for rich folks to bet on. May the best-trained brother win. 🥱😴
You can tell the MPAA came hard on "AS" because most of the money shots during swordplay are cut out or shortened. There are also noticeable continuity errors, like the Conan-esque fighter that is dispatched early but reappears in the background of latter scenes.🙄 The fighting doesn't play to director Firstenberg's strengths (ninjas in daylight) by taking place in the same bland indoor arena, and the monologuing about honor/father issues between Bradley and Dacascos drags down the pace. Cool fighting moments here and there (Dacascos really sells his turn to the dark side), but either Sam had lost his directorial touch or Cannon was too poor to give him the resources needed to recreate the old magic. 2.5 BLACK FIGHTERS WEARING WHITE DIAPERS SHOWN TRAINING BUT NOT IN AN ACTUAL FIGHT (out of five).
Writer/director John Carney's latest project continues his string of dramedies with strong musical influences on their characters' lives ("Once," "Begin Again," "Sing Street," etc.). Paul Rudd's Rick is a washed-up American musician who gave up his chance at stardom for a quiet life in Ireland with his wife/teenage girl, where he makes ends meet as a wedding singer. A chance encounter between Rick and struggling-to-break-from-boy-band-fame singer Danny Wilson (Nick Jonas) leads to the latter stealing an unpublished song from the former, which goes on to become a worldwide hit. Carney and his actors manage to make the two principals likable despite both doing unlikable things (Jonas quietly dumping the nice girlfriend he had in mind when copying Rick's song, Rick ruining a wedding by refusing to sing THE song) by showing their flaws as well as their humanity. Low-key and heartfelt more than funny, "Power Ballad" is good but not "Song Sung Blues"-level good. 3 MUGGED DUBLIN STREET MUSICIANS (out of five).
095.- KILLER WORKOUT (1987, AMAZON PRIME). Also streaming on TUBI, FAWESOME, FILMRISE, XUMO PLAY.
Writer/director David A. Prior's other '87 feature (released the same year as "Deadly Prey" and "Mankillers"), "Killer Workout" starts with the apparent death-by-burning of a beautiful woman while inside a malfunctioning tanning bed. Two years later, Rhonda Johnson (Marcia Karr) re-opens Rhonda's Workout Fitness Club in Los Angeles to the delight of its faithful clientele. But then a serial killer that uses a giant pin as a murder weapon (!) starts dispatching the club's patrons, bringing the attention of police (David Campbell) and civilians alike (Ted Prior, Fritz Matthews). Oozing sleaze more than menace (half the film's running time are close-up of beautiful women doing aerobics), "KW" never fully commits to being either a slasher, a police procedural or even a thriller. It's a marked improvement over Prior's previous horror flick (1982's "Sledgehammer"), but by '87 it feels like it's showing up a decade too late to the "Halloween" party. For David A. Prior completists only. 3.05 DIET PEPSI BOOTY CALLS (out of five).
The good news is that, after 43 years trying (mostly via animated reboots), Hollywood has made an adaptation of the "He-Man" 80's cartoon that matches the spirit and dopey sense of humor of its source material. The bad news: nobody (or very few) cared enough to go see it opening weekend. Shame because, when it isn't too busy making snide comments about itself (characters laughing in the forced pose of the recycled animation from the Filmation cartoon) or how silly the names are ("Star Wars" also has terrible names besides its own, but you never hear characters in-universe talk about it), "Masters of the Universe" is a fun, family-friendly sci-fi comedic romp. It effectively mixes both the cartoon lore (Eternia, Castle Grayskull, The Sorceress guarding the sword, magic mixed with advanced technology, etc.) and the '87 Cannon movie (opening act set on present-day Earth, complete with Dolph Lundgren cameo), and giving protagonist Adam (Nicholas Galitzine) a story arc from weakling human resources parrot to the most powerful man in the universe. Edris Elba (Duncan), Camila Mendes (Teela), Jared Leto (didn't know I'd appreciate a self-aware Skeletor), 'Fisto' 😳🤣 and many fan-favorites get in on the fun. Could have been better, but it also could have been so much worse. 3.5 ALISON BRIE-AS-EVIL-LYN INAPPROPRIATE 'BONER' JOKES WITH SKELETOR (out of five).
Anaconda (1997): I like Jennifer Lopez in movies. Not her music, or personality, but I think she's a decent actress. Yes I've seen Office Romance, and yes I enjoyed it. I also needed to scrub my brain from the 2025 version, so I got the 4k. For some reasons I couldn't find it at a normal price in north america, so I had to get the UK edition on ebay. Big snake, people d!e, there's a bit of screaming. it's a pretty simple movie, but a fun one. Who knew the poor sap who gets k!lled in the cold open would become the great Dany Trejo and become almost bigger than anybody in this movie.
Also, on Cannon Day, I ordered the Ninja Trilogy 4k boxset, because of course I did. A set that light on extras should be much cheaper, especially from Kino. I watched the first movie yesterday when Amazon delivered it and I'll be watching the rest during the week. I've seen them so long ago, I forgot Franco Nero was the main dude in the first movie.
A triple feature of folk horror from Eastern European countries that don't exist anymore.
From Yugoslavia: Leptirica a.k.a. The She-Butterfly (1973, dir. Đorđe Kadijević)
A small village is plagued by a vampire who keeps killing anyone working at the mill. As a lovelorn young man decides to become the new miller, a group of villagers hatch a plan to kill the vampire.
A lot of folk, not so much horror. Much more time is devoted to a group of bumbling villagers than the vampire. The comedy didn't work for me at all, but the ending (when we veer back to horror) was pretty entertaining, some of the Slavic vampire lore the movie utilizes was interesting, and there's some eerie music that enhances the mood.
From Czechoslovakia: Witchhammer (1970, dir. Otakar Vávra)
In the late 17th century, some villagers' innocent superstitions ignite a fear of witchcraft in the nobility, so they bring in an inquisitor to investigate, but he turns out to be more overzealous and ruthless in his craft than they anticipated.
The movie dramatizes real witch trials from the 1600's and lifts some of its dialogue straight from trial documents from that time. Knowing that makes me feel a little uneasy at enjoying the depiction of real life horrors, but it's just so damn entertaining! The black and white cinematography is gorgeous and Vladimír Šmeral as the smarmy inquisitor getting drunk on his power is one of the best movie villains I've seen in a long while.
From Soviet Union: Viy (1967, dir. Konstantin Ershov, Georgiy Kropachyov & Aleksandr Ptushko)
A seminary student is sent to give the last rites to a dying young woman, who he knows to be a witch. After her death, he must watch over her dead body for three nights, during which his faith is tested by strange occurrences and frightening visions.
This was goofier than I expected, it balances well between funny and scary. Some of the special effects, even if used sparingly, look silly, but it helps that they're presented in a pretty tongue-in-cheek way. Leonid Kuravlyov is excellent as the lead, and the score by Karen Khachaturian (nephew of the more famous Aram Khachaturian) goes hard. The movie's quite nippy at 77 minutes, which is also a plus.
(All three movies watched from the Severin boxset All the Haunts Be Ours: A Compendium of Folk Horror.)
Absolutely true on both counts. I don't buy a lot of new stuff these days, but occasionally I splurge for a boxset I like the look of (case in point: I've been enjoying this set so much, I just ordered All the Haunts Vol. 2 even though I'm only about a third of the way through the first one).
I have not gotten to the first one, but Viy and Witchhammer are winners. Viy is so whimsical in its style that it becomes funny, and Witchhammer is a dark story that does not get too dark to enjoy. Unfortunately, people get drunk on their power in real life. A film like Witchhammer is a good way to hide commentary on a repressive government in power at the time. Persecution is not confined to the 17th century.
My second bite of sexy vampire ladies of the 70s this month.
A naive young couple gets lured into a sexy vampire's swanky house in the middle of the California desert. There, the mysteriously pale hostess starts putting the moves on both of the guests, Frank-N-Furter-style. If you think the desert is an unusual place of residence for a vampire, you're right - but there is a reason. This is a very small production (coming from Corman's stable), but director Stephanie Rothman tries her best to create a sensual atmosphere despite budgetary constrains and limited acting skills of her cast. What shines through the rather standard story beats is her clear affection for the material at hand (like the loving references to both Stoker and Le Fanu in character names). Not great, but not bad.
I was pretty stoked to check this out as its on multiple "best 70s exploitation movie" lists and the premise sounded great: 'After the abolishment of the death penalty, California murderers are dumped on an island to spend the rest of their lives unsupervised.' Sounded kinda like Escape from NY! Then the opening credits featured a weirdly Johnny Cash-esque tune! But the movie itself was a huge letdown. Zero budget take on a small gang of thug men who keep women as s@x slaves and an eventual uprising to take them down. Felt like it was shot in someones backyard woods with no plot or real action to speak of. Sort of a low rent 'women in island prison' genre flick. PASS
The finest display of the Chicago accent in media. Puts the SNL "Da Bears" sketches to shame. All I wanted was for a character to say "We got a coloring contest fer da kids".
Rutger Hauer and Jennifer Jason Leigh are on fire in this excellent medieval times movie. I guess the only reason this wasn’t a monster blockbuster in 1984 was because of all the full frontal nudity and rape. There’s a lot of rape. I guess period accurate, but… it’s a lot. Otherwise, this rules!
THE DOUBLE O KID (1992) Corey Haim plays a teenager who fantasizes about being a spy, only to get caught up in an actual Bond-style spy caper. Somebody must’ve had high hopes for this, because the supporting cast is a long list of cult fave actors. It’s also a kid flick for the older kids, with occasional guns and murder. The tone is odd. It looks like a comedy, and it’s paced like a comedy, but there are no jokes or slapstick or farcical misunderstandings. But it’s not a straightforward action movie either. I guess the whole point of the movie is just “make Corey Haim look cool.” I like the guy, but that’s not enough to hang a whole film on.
30 days of fan films, day 16: TRANSMETROPOLITAN: ON THE STUMP (2011) Straightforward adaptation of a scene from the edgy Warren Ellis/Darrick Robertson comic, specifically the moment from issue #4 when foulmouthed future journalist Spider Jerusalem confronts the US President in a bathroom. Basically just two actors going at it, and I wonder if this is intended to be somebody’s audition reel. Amusing for the comic’s readers, but that’s about it.
Johnny Knoxville and his gang of miscreants are absolute fucking maniacs, and I mean that as the highest possible compliment. As a movie, this is nothing more than an extended episode of the notorious MTV prank show with unblurred injuries/nudity and unbleeped profanity, but god bless Knoxville and crew because it works.
Some of the pranks are obnoxious and mean-spirited (how Bam’s parents hadn’t hired a hitman to take him out by this point is a mystery) but a lot of them are both pure insanity and undeniably funny. The roller disco in a moving truck was a personal favorite, I want to try! Some, like pooping in a display toilet in a hardware store, feel like a step too far but I can’t deny laughing when they were going on. Your tolerance for bodily harm and/or excreta will guide you as to whether or not this is your jam. Personally, I laughed a ton and I’m looking forward to finally checking out the sequels.
Taking the day off before gearing up for the home stretch. I have some heavy hitters coming up! I'll check to read what people are watching today and insert smart-ass comments as needed. Appreciate all of you, have really enjoyed Junesploitation! 2026 thus far!
I FINALLY SAW IT!! Personally, I think that Ed Wood is Tim Burton's best film, but I had never seen the movie that inspired it. And, it's phenomenal. Yes, there are amateur-ish elements to it (I love the visible strings on the flying saucers), but I have seen lots of movies that aren't nearly as entertaining as this one. My favorite scenes are the ones with the alien ruler, Eros, and Tanna, because those three are acting the hell out of this material with a seriousness reminiscent of the finest Shakespearean drama.
ACL: It was voted-- in a poll of readers-- Worst Film Ever Made in the Medved brothers' 1980 book, The Golden Turkey Awards. Second place: The Exorcist II: The Heretic.
Clearly, there are much "worse" films than Plan 9. Perhaps it's best to consider it "Best of the Worst" or "Most Entertaining Bad Film Ever".
Wondering what you and other Junesploitation! participants consider to be the worst movie they've ever seen....
Ringo (1978): Eight years after the biggest band in the world broke up, their least loved member Ringo Starr — “Ringo wasn’t even the best drummer in The Beatles” is a quote often attributed to John Lennon, but it actually comes from British comedian Jasper Carrott, who said it on Radio Live, a British talk show; John actually said that Ringo was “a damn good drummer” — was probably wondered what to do.
Most of the time, that was to party. He said of his friends and fellow Hollywood Vampires Nilsson and Keith Moon, “We weren’t musicians dabbling in drugs and alcohol; now we were junkies dabbling in music.”
Yet Ringo still had enough cachet in 1978 to turn that existential dread into a prime-time NBC special.
Welcome to Ringo, a TV movie that sits comfortably in that sweet, strange spot between classic rock vanity project and absolute late-70s insanity. If you ever wondered what happened when the guys behind Police Academy got their hands on a Beatle and a copy of Mark Twain, well, here you go.
The premise is classic Prince and the Pauper, but instead of jolly old England, we’ve got Hollywood grime. Ringo plays himself—bored, pampered and totally over being famous—and he also plays his doppelgänger, Ognir Rrats, which is totally the Alucard trick. Then again, Ringo was in Son of Dracula.
While Ringo is being chauffeured around in limos and dealing with his horrid agent Marty Flesh (John Ritter), Ognir is out there selling maps to the stars’ homes, getting his bike pulverized by city buses and dodging an abusive father, played by Art Carney.
Let’s take a moment and talk about Art Carney. Perhaps best known for being Ed Norton on The Honeymooners, he also has some wild movies in his history. How about St. Helens, an HBO-TV movie with a Goblin soundtrack? Or being in Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson’s video for “Say Say Say?” Or playing Steeler’s owner Art Rooney in Fighting Back: The Story of Rocky Bleier? In 1978 alone, Carney played himself on Alice and was in Ringo and the Star Wars Holiday Special.
As Norton would say, “Like we say in the sewer, time and tide wait for no man.”
Anyway, Ringo and Ognir decide to swap lives for a few hours. Because, hey, why not? What could possibly go wrong?
The real problem? Rrats’ father, who beats Ringo as Rrats into submission, right in front of his woman. Also: We’re to believe that Marquine is underage, as Ringo sings “You’re Sixteen” to her.
Be better, Ringo. Or Rrats.
As for Rrats as Starr, he’s screwing everything up, even passing out before an appearance on The Mike Douglas Show and destroying his drum set, basically showing that he can’t play. Ringo gets so mad that he escapes and is arrested by Sgt. Suzanne “Pepper” Anderson and yes, that’s TV’s favorite police lady, Angie Dickinson. He gets out of jail thanks to Marquine, who takes him to the Ringo Starr concert.
Did I mention that this is narrated by George Harrison, and that he mentions The Ruttles?
Most of the characters are cartoonish and most of the plot beats are clichéd as hell, but the central setpiece is pretty effective and the actors aren't bad.
Probably the best movie Renny has made in 20 years! (Though that's a very low bar.)
Knightriders (1981): Now, that's my kind of weirdo movie. It's a good as everybody said during Romero Day. It's not what I expected from that guy, but I'm not complaining. Half the movie is mostly hanging out at the ren fair, which is the kind of thing I enjoy very much. And, as a Babylon 5 fan, I was pleased to see Patricia Tallman.
That being said, now that I've got the blu-ray, I'm pretty sure Shout will announce a 4k in the next couple of months.
I had a few Linda Blair discs I wanted to get through, so I used the Free Space! for Sorceress (1995)
This direct to video is pretty much what it looks like from the cover. Linda Blair being all witchy in a film with a whole lot of mid-90s silicone. I'm not sure Linda Blair is in a scene with any of the other actresses. Just about everyone else gets together at some point.
Before another great one from the GOAT I saw the trailer for THE DOG STARS and holy crap… the master Ridley Scott adapting a terrific post-apocalypse book and I am EXCITED!!!
I am exctied to see this as well. My trailer of this proclaimed Ridley Scott as the director of "The Martain", "The Last Duel", and "Black Hawk Down". Not that those are bad, but I weeped.
🤣🤣 I hear you. But the trailer is prob trying to get people like my 18-year-old daughter who LOVES The Martian but refuses to watch Alien or Blade Runner because they look scary and (this one hurts) boring.
This was my second time watching KPDH on a big screen with one streaming watch. The big screen is by far the better experience. Now that I know what is going on in the film, I was able to focus on the visuals. The little details in scenes stand out in theater. For example, the rooftop scene with Rumi confronting her vocal problems has a beautiful cityscape to admire. A sequence that continues to get better every time I see it is Your Idol. The lighting and the imagery adds to the creepy vibe of the song.
I still think the narrative has issues. The relationship between Celine and Huntrix should have been clarified more. It is clear in the meal scene after the failed Golden performance that no member of Huntrix is close to Celine, nor does contacting her seem to offer any positive outcome for them. With Rumi being raised by her, though, the confrontation at the conclusion between would have hit more with some details about their history. There already are hard feelings there between them.
Rumi's relationship with Jinu is still mysterious to me. Is it an attraction or a connection through dealing with their demon sides? A little of both, maybe? To be honest, the "Free" sequence feels like it comes out of nowhere. Have there been other meetings between them before that scene to foster a bond? What is clear is that despite having misgivings about betraying Rumi, Jinu chooses to pursue his selfish interests with Gwi-Ma to their inevitable outcome. His sacrifice does not fully atone for his actions in putting Rumi in that situation.
Please excuse my ramblings here. I have thought about these matters too much.
Highlander II: The Quickening (Renegade Version 1991, dir. Russell Mulcahy)
If when you were watching Highlander (1986) and you thought to yourself, "This is cool, but is NO ONE going to address the ozone layer??" then I have great news for you!
The general plot of the film revolves around the murder of gay man, the son of a wealthy businessman, in his apartment. It is a shockingly graphic crime to depict for the period. Gay life before the Stonewall revolt is on full display. Frank Sinatra is the NYPD detective on the case, confronting bigoted ideas from his colleagues and the pressure to solve the crime. A major subplot is the relationship with his ex-wife, portrayed by Lee Remick. The cast is excellent, featuring early work from Tom Atkins and Jacqueline Bisset. The film is, overall, uneven and on the long side, but there is something about it that really engaged me.
Though the film is not part of the New Hollywood movement, it is striking how the The Detective foreshadows the cynicism and greater openness of 1970s cinema. The censorship of the Hayes Code was falling, allowing for frank depictions (for the time) of homosexual subcultures and a discussion of female sexuality outside of marriage. The politics of the era are also at the forefront of the film. Frank Sinatra’s NYPD detective, Joe Leland, straddles the progressive politics of the time and the conservative worldview of the police department. When an officer (played by Robert Duvall) strikes a gay man caught up in a raid, Leland makes his displeasure with that kind of treatment known. He is also a man of integrity, which puts him at odds with the corruption he finds in the police and the system they are paid to uphold. Leland also believes in supporting his fellow cops, even when they make mistakes like shooting unarmed suspects.
I made a note to circle back to this one after reading Mikko's review on Kung Fu! day.
When the formula to a sperm-neutralizing super-sterilization drug is stolen (from...?), Timothy Dalton lookalike Richard Harrison and Bruce Lee namealike Bruce Le are called in by the CIA to make sure it doesn't fall into the wrong hands (because the people who stole it aren't already the wrong hands?). The plot doesn't matter. They get in fights (mostly Le) and sleep with women (all Harrison).
I found myself tuning out a little, but the movie is undeniably very Junesploitation-y. There are fights! There are explosions. There are boobs (playing tennis, looking in mirrors, being oiled, just hanging out)! There are beefy muscles! There is a bull!
My favorite part is when Richard Harrison tells a woman she has "nice little ears" while they're making out naked in a jacuzzi. It's pretty clearly filler ADR (he touches her ears; gotta say something), which the movie is chock full of.
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BONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 16!
ReplyDelete090.- THE PINK PANTHER STRIKES AGAIN (1976, KINO LORBER 4K UHD). Also streaming on AMAZON PRIME, TUBI, PLUTO, ROKU TV, YOUTUBE.
We've reached the summit. If you ever stop someone on the street and casually ask him/her 'What is the best 'Pink Panther' movie ever made?' and he/she responds 'Why, obviously it's 1976's 'The Pink Panther Strikes Again,' duh!' then you know you've made a friend for life. 😁 It's never happened (and will never happen) to me, but diehard fans of the series tend to agree. This is the madcap, live-action cartoon feature Blake Edwards was building up to before, and it's the one he (and decades later Steve Martin) tried to emulate but never matched, let alone surpassed. Continuing where 1975's "Return of..." prequel left off, it's been three years since former Chief Inspector Dreyfus (Herbert Lom) was institutionalized for losing his mind as he tried to kill now-Chief Inspector Clouseau (Peter Sellers). After a brief meeting at the sanitarium that snaps him completely, Dreyfus escapes the hospital and tries to dynamite Clouseau's apartment just as manservant Cato (Burt Kwouk) and the inspector are wrecking it. Then Dreyfus turns super villain, kidnapping a scientist and threatening the world with a death ray (color pink) that'll wipe cities/landmarks unless the governments of the world agree to kill Clouseau. Oh, and the Pink Panther diamond isn't even mentioned... or missed. 😏
It's a shame that the funniest and most entertaining 'PP' movie (Clouseau-as-dentist-in-disguise giving Dreyfus the laughing gas still makes me cry from laughing so hard! 🤣😂) came as a result of the estrangement between Sellers (emotionally and physically frail after suffering multiple strokes) and Edwards, who by the end of production weren't even talking to one another. Lom has always been a reliable supporting foil to Sellers' comedic shtick, and this chance to become a full-on heavy (complete with castle lair, "Phantom of the Opera" organ and Dracula-like cape) elevates the silliness to absurd levels. Most importantly, "... Strikes Again" manages to start strong, then top the previous gag, then proceeds to keep topping itself until the very end. No other "PP" before or since can claim that. This is also where Henry Mancini caps his musical feathers by composing 'The Inspector Clouseau' theme that, combined with my favorite scene in the series (Jacques trying to cross a moat to Dreyfus' castle), delivers comedy gold.😅🤭 Omar Sharif has a wordless cameo as an Egyptian assassin that, pretending to be Clouseau, bangs a Russian assassin (Lesley Anne-Down's Olga) so good she turns into a love-smitten groupie... which the actual Clouseau benefits from without ever knowing why Olga has the hots for him. God, I love this movie. 😍🥰
ANIMATED INTRO OPENING: 4.75 NODS TO JULIE ANDREWS' 'SOUND OF MUSIC' ROLE (out of five). The 2nd and last Richard Williams-produced opening continues the homages to classic Hollywood (King Kong, Chaplin, "Singing in the Rain," etc.), but falls slightly short of the prequel's masterpiece intro. By contrast, the ending credits' gag going from the end of the live action to an animated pitch-perfect parody of "Jaws" is easily the best ending to a 'PP' movie ever made.
MOVIE RATING: 5 DEEP ROYS TOSSED AROUND LIKE RAG DOLLS BY DRUNKEN GERMANS DURING OKTOBERFEST (out of five).
'SOMETHING NEW, SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING... YADDA, YADDA, YADDA' FREE-FOR-ALL!
ReplyDelete091.- NIGHTBEAST (1982, TUBI). Also streaming on PLEX, FAWESOME, CINEVERSE.
Nothing like a Don Dohler low-budget sci-fi flick to cleanse the palette. Building on his 1979 "Alien Factor" pedigree (same non-professional actors, vehicles, houses-as-hospitals, etc.), "Nightbeast" ups the ante by crash-landing a single alien somewhere in rural Maryland. This is one mean SOB creature that dismembers and/or laser-blasts many civilians (including children) before the local sheriff (Tom Griffith) and his female deputy get a chance to fight back. Special effects are surprisingly decent, especially the "Star Trek"-worthy 'poof' when a laser turns a person into disco particles.😅 'B' plots about an a-hole mountain biker (Don Leifert) murdering his girlfriend and the mayor refusing to close the town share screentime with the most awkward, non-p@rn sex scene ever filmed in Maryland! 😱🫣All that, plus the first production credit ever for J.J. Abrams as music composer. Feel free to blame the eventual downward spiral of the newer "Trek" and "Star Wars" franchises under J.J.'s direction on Don Dohler hiring young Abrams to work on this entertaining little flick. 3.5 SEXY WHITE MAN AFROS (out of five).
Love Dohler! Regional filmmaking at its finest. My favorite of his beside ALIEN FACTOR is 1991's BLOOD MASSACRE. Check it out! And don't blame Dohler for Abram's missteps-- while JJ follows Hollywood's capitalistic manifesto and merely pumps out product, Don brings all his passion to his projects, which is why they're so enjoyable.
Delete092.- DISCLOSURE DAY (2026, AMC DOLBY CINEMA)
ReplyDeleteSpoiler alert: I'm going to rank the newest Steven Spielberg theatrical release much lower than the Don Dohler space flick I just reviewed. It's all about expectations. Dohler's "Nightbeast" lived up to what I expected from his limited talent/resources, while "Disclosure Day" fails to come anywhere near the wonder or spectacle that Spielberg has delivered before JUST in the alien movie sub-genre ("Close Encounters...," "E.T.," "War of the Worlds," etc.), let alone his complete filmography. It's also lethargic in pace (I felt every single one of its 145 minutes piling on), has a weak leading man in Josh O'Connor (although Emily Blunt evens things out), is badly-written (by Spielberg, and that's after David Koepp polished the screenplay), and has a resolution so weak it made the actions by the characters getting there seem redundant. If henchman Casper (Henry Lloyd-Hughes) is so convinced Margaret and Daniel are such a threat to humanity he must kill them by ramming their car into an incoming train... he wouldn't toss his hands and walk away from the anchor desk just because bossman Noah (Colin Firth) has given up. He'd take the shot right in front of him! 😡😖This and "The Fablemans" prove that Spielberg should have retired while he was still on top ("Bridge of Spies"?). 2 INVISIBLE FIRETRUCKS SPLASHING ON STREET PUDDLES (out of five).
093.- AMERICAN SAMURAI (1992, FAWESOME). Also streaming on XUMO PLAY, MOMENTU+, FREE MOVIES.
ReplyDeleteDirector Sam Firstenberg and Cannon-produced ninja movies were a heavenly match in the 1980's. By the early 90's Cannon was on its last legs, but that didn't stop Firstenberg from trying to do for samurai what he'd done with ninjas. Starring David Bradley ("American Ninja 3/4") and Mark Dacascos in his feature-film debut, "American Samurai" starts as a tale of two brothers (one a baby white boy that fell from the sky inside a toy airplane! 😂🤩) trained by their father (Michael Dudikoff's sensei in OG "American Ninja") in the art of samurai. Grown-up Bradley honors his adopted father's teachings, while Dacascos spits on them and becomes a yakuza soldier. Teamed up with a sexy reporter (Valerie Trapp), Bradley travels from America to Turkey and eventually ends up taking part in a weapons-based, "Bloodsport"-type kumite for rich folks to bet on. May the best-trained brother win. 🥱😴
You can tell the MPAA came hard on "AS" because most of the money shots during swordplay are cut out or shortened. There are also noticeable continuity errors, like the Conan-esque fighter that is dispatched early but reappears in the background of latter scenes.🙄 The fighting doesn't play to director Firstenberg's strengths (ninjas in daylight) by taking place in the same bland indoor arena, and the monologuing about honor/father issues between Bradley and Dacascos drags down the pace. Cool fighting moments here and there (Dacascos really sells his turn to the dark side), but either Sam had lost his directorial touch or Cannon was too poor to give him the resources needed to recreate the old magic. 2.5 BLACK FIGHTERS WEARING WHITE DIAPERS SHOWN TRAINING BUT NOT IN AN ACTUAL FIGHT (out of five).
094.- POWER BALLAD ('26, THEATER)
ReplyDeleteWriter/director John Carney's latest project continues his string of dramedies with strong musical influences on their characters' lives ("Once," "Begin Again," "Sing Street," etc.). Paul Rudd's Rick is a washed-up American musician who gave up his chance at stardom for a quiet life in Ireland with his wife/teenage girl, where he makes ends meet as a wedding singer. A chance encounter between Rick and struggling-to-break-from-boy-band-fame singer Danny Wilson (Nick Jonas) leads to the latter stealing an unpublished song from the former, which goes on to become a worldwide hit. Carney and his actors manage to make the two principals likable despite both doing unlikable things (Jonas quietly dumping the nice girlfriend he had in mind when copying Rick's song, Rick ruining a wedding by refusing to sing THE song) by showing their flaws as well as their humanity. Low-key and heartfelt more than funny, "Power Ballad" is good but not "Song Sung Blues"-level good. 3 MUGGED DUBLIN STREET MUSICIANS (out of five).
095.- KILLER WORKOUT (1987, AMAZON PRIME). Also streaming on TUBI, FAWESOME, FILMRISE, XUMO PLAY.
ReplyDeleteWriter/director David A. Prior's other '87 feature (released the same year as "Deadly Prey" and "Mankillers"), "Killer Workout" starts with the apparent death-by-burning of a beautiful woman while inside a malfunctioning tanning bed. Two years later, Rhonda Johnson (Marcia Karr) re-opens Rhonda's Workout Fitness Club in Los Angeles to the delight of its faithful clientele. But then a serial killer that uses a giant pin as a murder weapon (!) starts dispatching the club's patrons, bringing the attention of police (David Campbell) and civilians alike (Ted Prior, Fritz Matthews). Oozing sleaze more than menace (half the film's running time are close-up of beautiful women doing aerobics), "KW" never fully commits to being either a slasher, a police procedural or even a thriller. It's a marked improvement over Prior's previous horror flick (1982's "Sledgehammer"), but by '87 it feels like it's showing up a decade too late to the "Halloween" party. For David A. Prior completists only. 3.05 DIET PEPSI BOOTY CALLS (out of five).
096.- MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE ('26, AMC PRIME)
ReplyDeleteThe good news is that, after 43 years trying (mostly via animated reboots), Hollywood has made an adaptation of the "He-Man" 80's cartoon that matches the spirit and dopey sense of humor of its source material. The bad news: nobody (or very few) cared enough to go see it opening weekend. Shame because, when it isn't too busy making snide comments about itself (characters laughing in the forced pose of the recycled animation from the Filmation cartoon) or how silly the names are ("Star Wars" also has terrible names besides its own, but you never hear characters in-universe talk about it), "Masters of the Universe" is a fun, family-friendly sci-fi comedic romp. It effectively mixes both the cartoon lore (Eternia, Castle Grayskull, The Sorceress guarding the sword, magic mixed with advanced technology, etc.) and the '87 Cannon movie (opening act set on present-day Earth, complete with Dolph Lundgren cameo), and giving protagonist Adam (Nicholas Galitzine) a story arc from weakling human resources parrot to the most powerful man in the universe. Edris Elba (Duncan), Camila Mendes (Teela), Jared Leto (didn't know I'd appreciate a self-aware Skeletor), 'Fisto' 😳🤣 and many fan-favorites get in on the fun. Could have been better, but it also could have been so much worse. 3.5 ALISON BRIE-AS-EVIL-LYN INAPPROPRIATE 'BONER' JOKES WITH SKELETOR (out of five).
BULLET IN THE HEAD (1990):
ReplyDeleteA little bit of everything #Junesploitation movies should be.
Anaconda (1997): I like Jennifer Lopez in movies. Not her music, or personality, but I think she's a decent actress. Yes I've seen Office Romance, and yes I enjoyed it. I also needed to scrub my brain from the 2025 version, so I got the 4k. For some reasons I couldn't find it at a normal price in north america, so I had to get the UK edition on ebay. Big snake, people d!e, there's a bit of screaming. it's a pretty simple movie, but a fun one. Who knew the poor sap who gets k!lled in the cold open would become the great Dany Trejo and become almost bigger than anybody in this movie.
ReplyDeleteAlso, on Cannon Day, I ordered the Ninja Trilogy 4k boxset, because of course I did. A set that light on extras should be much cheaper, especially from Kino. I watched the first movie yesterday when Amazon delivered it and I'll be watching the rest during the week. I've seen them so long ago, I forgot Franco Nero was the main dude in the first movie.
But seriously, I need an American Ninja boxset
A triple feature of folk horror from Eastern European countries that don't exist anymore.
ReplyDeleteFrom Yugoslavia: Leptirica a.k.a. The She-Butterfly (1973, dir. Đorđe Kadijević)
A small village is plagued by a vampire who keeps killing anyone working at the mill. As a lovelorn young man decides to become the new miller, a group of villagers hatch a plan to kill the vampire.
A lot of folk, not so much horror. Much more time is devoted to a group of bumbling villagers than the vampire. The comedy didn't work for me at all, but the ending (when we veer back to horror) was pretty entertaining, some of the Slavic vampire lore the movie utilizes was interesting, and there's some eerie music that enhances the mood.
From Czechoslovakia: Witchhammer (1970, dir. Otakar Vávra)
In the late 17th century, some villagers' innocent superstitions ignite a fear of witchcraft in the nobility, so they bring in an inquisitor to investigate, but he turns out to be more overzealous and ruthless in his craft than they anticipated.
The movie dramatizes real witch trials from the 1600's and lifts some of its dialogue straight from trial documents from that time. Knowing that makes me feel a little uneasy at enjoying the depiction of real life horrors, but it's just so damn entertaining! The black and white cinematography is gorgeous and Vladimír Šmeral as the smarmy inquisitor getting drunk on his power is one of the best movie villains I've seen in a long while.
From Soviet Union: Viy (1967, dir. Konstantin Ershov, Georgiy Kropachyov & Aleksandr Ptushko)
A seminary student is sent to give the last rites to a dying young woman, who he knows to be a witch. After her death, he must watch over her dead body for three nights, during which his faith is tested by strange occurrences and frightening visions.
This was goofier than I expected, it balances well between funny and scary. Some of the special effects, even if used sparingly, look silly, but it helps that they're presented in a pretty tongue-in-cheek way. Leonid Kuravlyov is excellent as the lead, and the score by Karen Khachaturian (nephew of the more famous Aram Khachaturian) goes hard. The movie's quite nippy at 77 minutes, which is also a plus.
(All three movies watched from the Severin boxset All the Haunts Be Ours: A Compendium of Folk Horror.)
It's the best time to be a physical media fan when obscure stuff like these is released by boutique labels... if the price is right. 🤨
DeleteAbsolutely true on both counts. I don't buy a lot of new stuff these days, but occasionally I splurge for a boxset I like the look of (case in point: I've been enjoying this set so much, I just ordered All the Haunts Vol. 2 even though I'm only about a third of the way through the first one).
DeleteNot only do we get obscur stuff, but they're well treated. No more dumping 15 movies on one dvd from a vhs rip.
DeleteAmazing choices! I want to see all of these.
DeleteI have not gotten to the first one, but Viy and Witchhammer are winners. Viy is so whimsical in its style that it becomes funny, and Witchhammer is a dark story that does not get too dark to enjoy. Unfortunately, people get drunk on their power in real life. A film like Witchhammer is a good way to hide commentary on a repressive government in power at the time. Persecution is not confined to the 17th century.
DeleteLive Free or Die Hard aka. Die Hard 4.0 (2007) dir. Len Wiseman
ReplyDeleteI can confirm that this is not the best Die Hard.
Wait for the next one, it's even worse
DeleteThe Velvet Vampire (1971)
ReplyDeleteMy second bite of sexy vampire ladies of the 70s this month.
A naive young couple gets lured into a sexy vampire's swanky house in the middle of the California desert. There, the mysteriously pale hostess starts putting the moves on both of the guests, Frank-N-Furter-style. If you think the desert is an unusual place of residence for a vampire, you're right - but there is a reason. This is a very small production (coming from Corman's stable), but director Stephanie Rothman tries her best to create a sensual atmosphere despite budgetary constrains and limited acting skills of her cast. What shines through the rather standard story beats is her clear affection for the material at hand (like the loving references to both Stoker and Le Fanu in character names). Not great, but not bad.
Terminal Island (1973)
ReplyDeleteI was pretty stoked to check this out as its on multiple "best 70s exploitation movie" lists and the premise sounded great: 'After the abolishment of the death penalty, California murderers are dumped on an island to spend the rest of their lives unsupervised.' Sounded kinda like Escape from NY! Then the opening credits featured a weirdly Johnny Cash-esque tune! But the movie itself was a huge letdown. Zero budget take on a small gang of thug men who keep women as s@x slaves and an eventual uprising to take them down. Felt like it was shot in someones backyard woods with no plot or real action to speak of. Sort of a low rent 'women in island prison' genre flick. PASS
Back to back Stephanie Rothman flicks!
DeleteWOAH....great observation Adam...that is BANANAS
DeleteCode of Silence (1985, dir. Andrew Davis)
ReplyDeleteThe finest display of the Chicago accent in media. Puts the SNL "Da Bears" sketches to shame. All I wanted was for a character to say "We got a coloring contest fer da kids".
FLESH + BLOOD (1984) dir. Paul Verhoeven
ReplyDeleteRutger Hauer and Jennifer Jason Leigh are on fire in this excellent medieval times movie. I guess the only reason this wasn’t a monster blockbuster in 1984 was because of all the full frontal nudity and rape. There’s a lot of rape. I guess period accurate, but… it’s a lot. Otherwise, this rules!
THE DOUBLE O KID (1992)
ReplyDeleteCorey Haim plays a teenager who fantasizes about being a spy, only to get caught up in an actual Bond-style spy caper. Somebody must’ve had high hopes for this, because the supporting cast is a long list of cult fave actors. It’s also a kid flick for the older kids, with occasional guns and murder. The tone is odd. It looks like a comedy, and it’s paced like a comedy, but there are no jokes or slapstick or farcical misunderstandings. But it’s not a straightforward action movie either. I guess the whole point of the movie is just “make Corey Haim look cool.” I like the guy, but that’s not enough to hang a whole film on.
30 days of fan films, day 16: TRANSMETROPOLITAN: ON THE STUMP (2011)
Straightforward adaptation of a scene from the edgy Warren Ellis/Darrick Robertson comic, specifically the moment from issue #4 when foulmouthed future journalist Spider Jerusalem confronts the US President in a bathroom. Basically just two actors going at it, and I wonder if this is intended to be somebody’s audition reel. Amusing for the comic’s readers, but that’s about it.
Wait, they made a fan film from Transmet? How did i miss thiss
DeleteAgain, it's very small. I just wanted to mix things up so this month's fan films aren't all just Batman and Star Wars.
DeleteIt's just that Transmet wouldn't be the first comic that comes to mind to make a fan film about, but i applaud the idea.
DeleteI immediately sent it to my comic book lover friend and watched it. We had the same reaction: we want to re-read the comic again.
Jackass: The Movie
ReplyDeleteJohnny Knoxville and his gang of miscreants are absolute fucking maniacs, and I mean that as the highest possible compliment. As a movie, this is nothing more than an extended episode of the notorious MTV prank show with unblurred injuries/nudity and unbleeped profanity, but god bless Knoxville and crew because it works.
Some of the pranks are obnoxious and mean-spirited (how Bam’s parents hadn’t hired a hitman to take him out by this point is a mystery) but a lot of them are both pure insanity and undeniably funny. The roller disco in a moving truck was a personal favorite, I want to try! Some, like pooping in a display toilet in a hardware store, feel like a step too far but I can’t deny laughing when they were going on. Your tolerance for bodily harm and/or excreta will guide you as to whether or not this is your jam. Personally, I laughed a ton and I’m looking forward to finally checking out the sequels.
Vampire’s Kiss (1988, dir. Robert Bierman)
ReplyDeleteA great movie to show children when it's time to learn the alphabet.
First viewing for my partner, and she enjoyed it as well!
FREE SPACE!
ReplyDeleteTaking the day off before gearing up for the home stretch. I have some heavy hitters coming up! I'll check to read what people are watching today and insert smart-ass comments as needed. Appreciate all of you, have really enjoyed Junesploitation! 2026 thus far!
Plan 9 From Outer Space (1958)
ReplyDeleteI FINALLY SAW IT!! Personally, I think that Ed Wood is Tim Burton's best film, but I had never seen the movie that inspired it. And, it's phenomenal. Yes, there are amateur-ish elements to it (I love the visible strings on the flying saucers), but I have seen lots of movies that aren't nearly as entertaining as this one. My favorite scenes are the ones with the alien ruler, Eros, and Tanna, because those three are acting the hell out of this material with a seriousness reminiscent of the finest Shakespearean drama.
"Can you prove that it didn't happen?
DeleteHow Plan 9 got the label "worst film ever made" mystifies me. It manages to be entertaining, which many movies with much higher budgets fail to do.
DeleteACL: It was voted-- in a poll of readers-- Worst Film Ever Made in the Medved brothers' 1980 book, The Golden Turkey Awards. Second place: The Exorcist II: The Heretic.
DeleteClearly, there are much "worse" films than Plan 9. Perhaps it's best to consider it "Best of the Worst" or "Most Entertaining Bad Film Ever".
Wondering what you and other Junesploitation! participants consider to be the worst movie they've ever seen....
Ringo (1978): Eight years after the biggest band in the world broke up, their least loved member Ringo Starr — “Ringo wasn’t even the best drummer in The Beatles” is a quote often attributed to John Lennon, but it actually comes from British comedian Jasper Carrott, who said it on Radio Live, a British talk show; John actually said that Ringo was “a damn good drummer” — was probably wondered what to do.
ReplyDeleteMost of the time, that was to party. He said of his friends and fellow Hollywood Vampires Nilsson and Keith Moon, “We weren’t musicians dabbling in drugs and alcohol; now we were junkies dabbling in music.”
Yet Ringo still had enough cachet in 1978 to turn that existential dread into a prime-time NBC special.
Welcome to Ringo, a TV movie that sits comfortably in that sweet, strange spot between classic rock vanity project and absolute late-70s insanity. If you ever wondered what happened when the guys behind Police Academy got their hands on a Beatle and a copy of Mark Twain, well, here you go.
The premise is classic Prince and the Pauper, but instead of jolly old England, we’ve got Hollywood grime. Ringo plays himself—bored, pampered and totally over being famous—and he also plays his doppelgänger, Ognir Rrats, which is totally the Alucard trick. Then again, Ringo was in Son of Dracula.
While Ringo is being chauffeured around in limos and dealing with his horrid agent Marty Flesh (John Ritter), Ognir is out there selling maps to the stars’ homes, getting his bike pulverized by city buses and dodging an abusive father, played by Art Carney.
Let’s take a moment and talk about Art Carney. Perhaps best known for being Ed Norton on The Honeymooners, he also has some wild movies in his history. How about St. Helens, an HBO-TV movie with a Goblin soundtrack? Or being in Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson’s video for “Say Say Say?” Or playing Steeler’s owner Art Rooney in Fighting Back: The Story of Rocky Bleier? In 1978 alone, Carney played himself on Alice and was in Ringo and the Star Wars Holiday Special.
As Norton would say, “Like we say in the sewer, time and tide wait for no man.”
Anyway, Ringo and Ognir decide to swap lives for a few hours. Because, hey, why not? What could possibly go wrong?
The real problem? Rrats’ father, who beats Ringo as Rrats into submission, right in front of his woman. Also: We’re to believe that Marquine is underage, as Ringo sings “You’re Sixteen” to her.
Be better, Ringo. Or Rrats.
As for Rrats as Starr, he’s screwing everything up, even passing out before an appearance on The Mike Douglas Show and destroying his drum set, basically showing that he can’t play. Ringo gets so mad that he escapes and is arrested by Sgt. Suzanne “Pepper” Anderson and yes, that’s TV’s favorite police lady, Angie Dickinson. He gets out of jail thanks to Marquine, who takes him to the Ringo Starr concert.
Did I mention that this is narrated by George Harrison, and that he mentions The Ruttles?
Deep Water (2026, dir. My Boy Renny Harlin)
ReplyDeletePlot synopsis: Plane crashes. Sharks attack.
Most of the characters are cartoonish and most of the plot beats are clichéd as hell, but the central setpiece is pretty effective and the actors aren't bad.
Probably the best movie Renny has made in 20 years! (Though that's a very low bar.)
Knightriders (1981): Now, that's my kind of weirdo movie. It's a good as everybody said during Romero Day. It's not what I expected from that guy, but I'm not complaining. Half the movie is mostly hanging out at the ren fair, which is the kind of thing I enjoy very much. And, as a Babylon 5 fan, I was pleased to see Patricia Tallman.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, now that I've got the blu-ray, I'm pretty sure Shout will announce a 4k in the next couple of months.
I had a few Linda Blair discs I wanted to get through, so I used the Free Space! for Sorceress (1995)
ReplyDeleteThis direct to video is pretty much what it looks like from the cover. Linda Blair being all witchy in a film with a whole lot of mid-90s silicone. I'm not sure Linda Blair is in a scene with any of the other actresses. Just about everyone else gets together at some point.
DISCLOSURE DAY (2026)
ReplyDeletedir. Steven Spielberg
Before another great one from the GOAT I saw the trailer for THE DOG STARS and holy crap… the master Ridley Scott adapting a terrific post-apocalypse book and I am EXCITED!!!
I am exctied to see this as well. My trailer of this proclaimed Ridley Scott as the director of "The Martain", "The Last Duel", and "Black Hawk Down". Not that those are bad, but I weeped.
Delete🤣🤣 I hear you. But the trailer is prob trying to get people like my 18-year-old daughter who LOVES The Martian but refuses to watch Alien or Blade Runner because they look scary and (this one hurts) boring.
DeleteK-POP DEMON HUNTERS (2025) Sing-Along Screening
ReplyDeleteThis was my second time watching KPDH on a big screen with one streaming watch. The big screen is by far the better experience. Now that I know what is going on in the film, I was able to focus on the visuals. The little details in scenes stand out in theater. For example, the rooftop scene with Rumi confronting her vocal problems has a beautiful cityscape to admire. A sequence that continues to get better every time I see it is Your Idol. The lighting and the imagery adds to the creepy vibe of the song.
I still think the narrative has issues. The relationship between Celine and Huntrix should have been clarified more. It is clear in the meal scene after the failed Golden performance that no member of Huntrix is close to Celine, nor does contacting her seem to offer any positive outcome for them. With Rumi being raised by her, though, the confrontation at the conclusion between would have hit more with some details about their history. There already are hard feelings there between them.
Rumi's relationship with Jinu is still mysterious to me. Is it an attraction or a connection through dealing with their demon sides? A little of both, maybe? To be honest, the "Free" sequence feels like it comes out of nowhere. Have there been other meetings between them before that scene to foster a bond? What is clear is that despite having misgivings about betraying Rumi, Jinu chooses to pursue his selfish interests with Gwi-Ma to their inevitable outcome. His sacrifice does not fully atone for his actions in putting Rumi in that situation.
Please excuse my ramblings here. I have thought about these matters too much.
Highlander II: The Quickening (Renegade Version 1991, dir. Russell Mulcahy)
ReplyDeleteIf when you were watching Highlander (1986) and you thought to yourself, "This is cool, but is NO ONE going to address the ozone layer??" then I have great news for you!
THE DETECTIVE (1968, dir. Gordon Douglas)
ReplyDeleteThe general plot of the film revolves around the murder of gay man, the son of a wealthy businessman, in his apartment. It is a shockingly graphic crime to depict for the period. Gay life before the Stonewall revolt is on full display. Frank Sinatra is the NYPD detective on the case, confronting bigoted ideas from his colleagues and the pressure to solve the crime. A major subplot is the relationship with his ex-wife, portrayed by Lee Remick. The cast is excellent, featuring early work from Tom Atkins and Jacqueline Bisset. The film is, overall, uneven and on the long side, but there is something about it that really engaged me.
Though the film is not part of the New Hollywood movement, it is striking how the The Detective foreshadows the cynicism and greater openness of 1970s cinema. The censorship of the Hayes Code was falling, allowing for frank depictions (for the time) of homosexual subcultures and a discussion of female sexuality outside of marriage. The politics of the era are also at the forefront of the film. Frank Sinatra’s NYPD detective, Joe Leland, straddles the progressive politics of the time and the conservative worldview of the police department. When an officer (played by Robert Duvall) strikes a gay man caught up in a raid, Leland makes his displeasure with that kind of treatment known. He is also a man of integrity, which puts him at odds with the corruption he finds in the police and the system they are paid to uphold. Leland also believes in supporting his fellow cops, even when they make mistakes like shooting unarmed suspects.
Challenge of the Tiger (1980)
ReplyDeleteI made a note to circle back to this one after reading Mikko's review on Kung Fu! day.
When the formula to a sperm-neutralizing super-sterilization drug is stolen (from...?), Timothy Dalton lookalike Richard Harrison and Bruce Lee namealike Bruce Le are called in by the CIA to make sure it doesn't fall into the wrong hands (because the people who stole it aren't already the wrong hands?). The plot doesn't matter. They get in fights (mostly Le) and sleep with women (all Harrison).
I found myself tuning out a little, but the movie is undeniably very Junesploitation-y. There are fights! There are explosions. There are boobs (playing tennis, looking in mirrors, being oiled, just hanging out)! There are beefy muscles! There is a bull!
My favorite part is when Richard Harrison tells a woman she has "nice little ears" while they're making out naked in a jacuzzi. It's pretty clearly filler ADR (he touches her ears; gotta say something), which the movie is chock full of.