'LA COPPIA PIÙ DILIGENTE DEL MONDO DELLO SPETTACOLO ITALIANO' TRIPLE-DECKER! 104.- STREET LAW (ITALY, 1974, BLUE UNDERGROUND DVD). Also streaming on TUBI, PLUTO TV.
Chemical engineer Carlo Antonelli (playing-against-type Franco Nero) is kidnapped/humiliated by armed thugs pulling a violent robbery at the post office he was in. Despite pleas from his girlfriend ("The Spy Who Loved Me's" Barbara Bach) and the police to move on, Carlo's background in the Italian Resistance during World War II and his wounded sense of pride push him to pursue his assailants. Carlo eventually befriends a low-level criminal (Giancarlo Prete's Tommy) who takes pity on him, with the two planning how to let the bad guys incriminate themselves to be arrested. This isn't "Death Wish" or a typical 'poliziotteschi' where Franco kicks ass and shoots the bad guys to cathartic audience approval. Director Enzo G. Castellari ("The Inglorious Bastards") makes it a point to show Nero's nervous/terrified face in slow motion as cars run him over (lthat's the picture above! 🧐) or bullets zoom by his head. Carlo symbolizes the average Italian citizen in the 1970's frustrated with crime and ineffective police, and the impotence/loss of control that'd result if they actually tried to take the law into their own hands. The bad guys chasing after Carlo are sadistic monsters, yet no emotional release comes from their eventual demise since we witness the price (physical, emotional and personal) ultimately paid by our "hero." 4 GREEN MUSTANGS COVERED IN SLOMO DIRT (out of five).
105.- THE LEGEND OF VALENTINO: A ROMANTIC FICTION (1975, AMAZON PRIME)
An Aaron Spelling-produced, ABC made-for-TV movie about the life of silent era movie star Rudolph Valentino (a mustache-less Franco Nero), from would-be immigrant thief at the home of screenwriter June Mathis (Suzanne Pleshette, who also narrates) to movie sex symbol. As the subtitle 'A Romantic Fiction' indicates, writer/director Melville Shavelson has no trouble making melodramatic shit up to shoehorn typical showbiz backstabbing tropes between studio heads (Judd Hirsch versus Milton Berle), starlets (Lesley Ann Warren versus Yvette Mimieux) and opportunists trying to ride the coattails of Valentino's fame. Nero shows off his sexy accent, blue eyes and physical presence (in re-enactments of Valentino's best-known pics as well as 'real life' arguments with girlfriends, allies and groupies throwing themselves at him). Pleshette and Hirsch have great chemistry together, and Milton Berle steals the few scenes he's in. 'It's fine,' but feels like watered-down-for-network-TV "Great Gatsby's" sloppy seconds. 3.20 MONKEYS IN JUNE MATHIS' KITCHEN TABLE (out of five).
Or the one where Franco Nero plays an uncredited blonde, blue-eyed 'Jesus Christ'-like figure, protector of small bald children in some parallel universe where he teaches them about the eternal battle between intergalactic good ('Yahweh') and defeated-but-Earth-bound, psychic energy-powered evil ('Zatteen') waiting for a chance to re-emerge from the handful of human progeny it spawned with Earthly women decades before its death. It's up to enigmatic Jerzy Colsowicz (John Huston) and his crew to track down 8-year-old Atlanta resident Katy Collins (Paige Conner) to... you'll have to wait until the very end to find out if Jerzy is Obi Wan Kenobi-type savior or Darth Maul-like harbinger of doom. What's certain is that Katy is manifesting supernatural powers that put in danger friends (her poor mother Barbara, aka Joanne Nail) and foes alike (Lance Henriksen's would-be stepfather from hell), with civilians (Glenn Ford's detective, Shelley Winters' servant, bully ice skaters, a motorcyclist plastered against a car windshield, etc.) caught in the middle of her youthful rampage. All that plus a too-drunk-to-remember-his-lines Sam Peckinpah, whose initially beefy role as Barbara's ex had to be cut back significantly.😤🤪
When you think 'batshit crazy Italian exploitation at its most entertaining best,' "The Visitor" (and its amazing, often-repeated Franco Micalizzi musical theme) has to be near the top of the list. I can tell you about it 'till I'm blue in the face, but you have to see/experience it for yourself to appreciate the miracle that is this masterpiece existing in a pristine Arrow 4K UHD disc. Some days I wish I wasn't an Atheist so I could thank God for being alive and capable of appreciating genre cinema of this caliber. 😎🤠 5 JOHN HUSTON FUNNY FACES AS STARS DANCE/ALIGN ABOVE HIS HEAD (out of five).
I had the chance to see The Visitor at a film festival in Pittsburgh in the early 2010s. It is an experience that I have not forgotten. The skating rink sequence remains one of the most ridiculous scenes I can remember watching.
BONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 18! 107.- THE REVENGE OF THE PINK PANTHER (1978, KINO LORBER 4K UHD). Also streaming on AMAZON PRIME, TUBI, PLUTO, ROKU TV, YOUTUBE.
The final 'Pink Panther' movie starring Peter Sellers, who again was in frail health after another heart attack the year before and still hated working with Blake Edwards. Money is stronger than hate, though, as this turned out to be the 2nd most financially successful entry in the series (and almost doubled what "The Pink Panther Strikes Again" made at the box office two years prior). Chief Inspector Clouseau is targeted for assassination by French businessman Philippe Douvier (Robert Webber), secret boss of the French Connection criminal organization, to demonstrate to New York mobsters that he's got the muscle to go through with a lucrative drug deal. A convoluted set of circumstances (including the inspector running into a transvestite robber stealing his car and clothes) results in the apparent death of Clouseau by Douvier's men. Pretending to be dead so his enemies don't see him coming, Clouseau and manservant Cato (Burt Kwouk, who gets to play sidekick and work on the field with his boss) team-up with Douvier's secretary Simone (Dyan Cannon), who is upset at her former boss/lover for dumping her, to intercept the drug deal in Hong Kong and catch the French and New York mobsters 'infraganti.' Oh, and despite holding the world hostage before, Charles Dreyfus (Herbert Lom) is back as Sûreté Chief Inspector... if the sight of Clouseau alive and well doesn't crack him up first. 😅🥰
From the disco beat added to the 'PP' opening theme song to the many forced accidents/crashing vehicle gags (many not involving Clouseau or Dreyfus) culminating in a fireworks factory free-for-all in the docks of Hong Kong, this is the first Sellers/Edwards entry in the series that feels perfunctory and going through the motions. Graham Stark's Professor Balls giving Clouseau a variety of disguises (including a 'Godfather' fat suit) is an unfunny recurring gag; the Swedish sailor with an inflatable parrot foggy dock scene seems to go on forever.🙄🥱 It's nice for a change of pace to have Dyan Cannon playing an active female protagonist who isn't a damsel in distress or sexy dame, with Burt Kwouk's blinded-by-prescription-glasses Cato complementing the dysfunctional trio. It's a shame Herbert Lom (so good in "... Strikes Again") is underused as a reactor instead of chaos instigator. Robert Webber's Douvier is such a generic crime boss his henchmen (Robert Loggia and Paul Stewart) outshine him the few times they share scenes. Still worth seeing (really fun/silly moments creep up semi-frequently), but by far the weakest of the 70's 'Pink Panther' revival era (ERA!) trilogy.
ANIMATED INTRO OPENING: 3.5 GIANT TYPEWRITERS (out of five). A visible downgrade from its '75 and '76 predecessors, with Marvel Animation replacing Richard Williams Studio. Slightly-above TV quality cartoon gags (letters turning into barking dogs, bombs melting paintings, etc.) complement the disco beat given to Henry Mancini's theme song. 'It's fine-ish'.
MOVIE RATING: 3.35 MALFUNCTIONING SILVER HORNET SUPERCARS (out of five).
A QUIET PLACE IN THE COUNTRY (1968, dir. Elio Petri)
A crowd-pleasing piece of cinema this is not. Actor of the day Franco Nero is in serious mode as a painter becoming more and more convinced that the ghost of a young woman is haunting the Italian villa he just purchased. He is also in an increasingly strained relationship with his girlfriend (Vanessa Redgrave) and struggling with a major artistic block. This is one of those "is it real" kind of movies, with dreams and nightmares mingling with everyday life. With this being on my watchlist for many years, I had the patience today to settle in to an arthouse experience.
The editing and the score by Ennio Morricone is very avant-garde at certain moments during the film.
'LA COPPIA PIÙ DILIGENTE DEL MONDO DELLO SPETTACOLO ITALIANO' TRIPLE-DECKER!
ReplyDelete104.- STREET LAW (ITALY, 1974, BLUE UNDERGROUND DVD). Also streaming on TUBI, PLUTO TV.
Chemical engineer Carlo Antonelli (playing-against-type Franco Nero) is kidnapped/humiliated by armed thugs pulling a violent robbery at the post office he was in. Despite pleas from his girlfriend ("The Spy Who Loved Me's" Barbara Bach) and the police to move on, Carlo's background in the Italian Resistance during World War II and his wounded sense of pride push him to pursue his assailants. Carlo eventually befriends a low-level criminal (Giancarlo Prete's Tommy) who takes pity on him, with the two planning how to let the bad guys incriminate themselves to be arrested. This isn't "Death Wish" or a typical 'poliziotteschi' where Franco kicks ass and shoots the bad guys to cathartic audience approval. Director Enzo G. Castellari ("The Inglorious Bastards") makes it a point to show Nero's nervous/terrified face in slow motion as cars run him over (lthat's the picture above! 🧐) or bullets zoom by his head. Carlo symbolizes the average Italian citizen in the 1970's frustrated with crime and ineffective police, and the impotence/loss of control that'd result if they actually tried to take the law into their own hands. The bad guys chasing after Carlo are sadistic monsters, yet no emotional release comes from their eventual demise since we witness the price (physical, emotional and personal) ultimately paid by our "hero." 4 GREEN MUSTANGS COVERED IN SLOMO DIRT (out of five).
105.- THE LEGEND OF VALENTINO: A ROMANTIC FICTION (1975, AMAZON PRIME)
ReplyDeleteAn Aaron Spelling-produced, ABC made-for-TV movie about the life of silent era movie star Rudolph Valentino (a mustache-less Franco Nero), from would-be immigrant thief at the home of screenwriter June Mathis (Suzanne Pleshette, who also narrates) to movie sex symbol. As the subtitle 'A Romantic Fiction' indicates, writer/director Melville Shavelson has no trouble making melodramatic shit up to shoehorn typical showbiz backstabbing tropes between studio heads (Judd Hirsch versus Milton Berle), starlets (Lesley Ann Warren versus Yvette Mimieux) and opportunists trying to ride the coattails of Valentino's fame. Nero shows off his sexy accent, blue eyes and physical presence (in re-enactments of Valentino's best-known pics as well as 'real life' arguments with girlfriends, allies and groupies throwing themselves at him). Pleshette and Hirsch have great chemistry together, and Milton Berle steals the few scenes he's in. 'It's fine,' but feels like watered-down-for-network-TV "Great Gatsby's" sloppy seconds. 3.20 MONKEYS IN JUNE MATHIS' KITCHEN TABLE (out of five).
106.- THE VISITOR (ITALY/USA, 1979, ARROW 4K UHD)
ReplyDeleteOr the one where Franco Nero plays an uncredited blonde, blue-eyed 'Jesus Christ'-like figure, protector of small bald children in some parallel universe where he teaches them about the eternal battle between intergalactic good ('Yahweh') and defeated-but-Earth-bound, psychic energy-powered evil ('Zatteen') waiting for a chance to re-emerge from the handful of human progeny it spawned with Earthly women decades before its death. It's up to enigmatic Jerzy Colsowicz (John Huston) and his crew to track down 8-year-old Atlanta resident Katy Collins (Paige Conner) to... you'll have to wait until the very end to find out if Jerzy is Obi Wan Kenobi-type savior or Darth Maul-like harbinger of doom. What's certain is that Katy is manifesting supernatural powers that put in danger friends (her poor mother Barbara, aka Joanne Nail) and foes alike (Lance Henriksen's would-be stepfather from hell), with civilians (Glenn Ford's detective, Shelley Winters' servant, bully ice skaters, a motorcyclist plastered against a car windshield, etc.) caught in the middle of her youthful rampage. All that plus a too-drunk-to-remember-his-lines Sam Peckinpah, whose initially beefy role as Barbara's ex had to be cut back significantly.😤🤪
When you think 'batshit crazy Italian exploitation at its most entertaining best,' "The Visitor" (and its amazing, often-repeated Franco Micalizzi musical theme) has to be near the top of the list. I can tell you about it 'till I'm blue in the face, but you have to see/experience it for yourself to appreciate the miracle that is this masterpiece existing in a pristine Arrow 4K UHD disc. Some days I wish I wasn't an Atheist so I could thank God for being alive and capable of appreciating genre cinema of this caliber. 😎🤠 5 JOHN HUSTON FUNNY FACES AS STARS DANCE/ALIGN ABOVE HIS HEAD (out of five).
I had the chance to see The Visitor at a film festival in Pittsburgh in the early 2010s. It is an experience that I have not forgotten. The skating rink sequence remains one of the most ridiculous scenes I can remember watching.
DeleteBONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 18!
ReplyDelete107.- THE REVENGE OF THE PINK PANTHER (1978, KINO LORBER 4K UHD). Also streaming on AMAZON PRIME, TUBI, PLUTO, ROKU TV, YOUTUBE.
The final 'Pink Panther' movie starring Peter Sellers, who again was in frail health after another heart attack the year before and still hated working with Blake Edwards. Money is stronger than hate, though, as this turned out to be the 2nd most financially successful entry in the series (and almost doubled what "The Pink Panther Strikes Again" made at the box office two years prior). Chief Inspector Clouseau is targeted for assassination by French businessman Philippe Douvier (Robert Webber), secret boss of the French Connection criminal organization, to demonstrate to New York mobsters that he's got the muscle to go through with a lucrative drug deal. A convoluted set of circumstances (including the inspector running into a transvestite robber stealing his car and clothes) results in the apparent death of Clouseau by Douvier's men. Pretending to be dead so his enemies don't see him coming, Clouseau and manservant Cato (Burt Kwouk, who gets to play sidekick and work on the field with his boss) team-up with Douvier's secretary Simone (Dyan Cannon), who is upset at her former boss/lover for dumping her, to intercept the drug deal in Hong Kong and catch the French and New York mobsters 'infraganti.' Oh, and despite holding the world hostage before, Charles Dreyfus (Herbert Lom) is back as Sûreté Chief Inspector... if the sight of Clouseau alive and well doesn't crack him up first. 😅🥰
From the disco beat added to the 'PP' opening theme song to the many forced accidents/crashing vehicle gags (many not involving Clouseau or Dreyfus) culminating in a fireworks factory free-for-all in the docks of Hong Kong, this is the first Sellers/Edwards entry in the series that feels perfunctory and going through the motions. Graham Stark's Professor Balls giving Clouseau a variety of disguises (including a 'Godfather' fat suit) is an unfunny recurring gag; the Swedish sailor with an inflatable parrot foggy dock scene seems to go on forever.🙄🥱 It's nice for a change of pace to have Dyan Cannon playing an active female protagonist who isn't a damsel in distress or sexy dame, with Burt Kwouk's blinded-by-prescription-glasses Cato complementing the dysfunctional trio. It's a shame Herbert Lom (so good in "... Strikes Again") is underused as a reactor instead of chaos instigator. Robert Webber's Douvier is such a generic crime boss his henchmen (Robert Loggia and Paul Stewart) outshine him the few times they share scenes. Still worth seeing (really fun/silly moments creep up semi-frequently), but by far the weakest of the 70's 'Pink Panther' revival era (ERA!) trilogy.
ANIMATED INTRO OPENING: 3.5 GIANT TYPEWRITERS (out of five). A visible downgrade from its '75 and '76 predecessors, with Marvel Animation replacing Richard Williams Studio. Slightly-above TV quality cartoon gags (letters turning into barking dogs, bombs melting paintings, etc.) complement the disco beat given to Henry Mancini's theme song. 'It's fine-ish'.
MOVIE RATING: 3.35 MALFUNCTIONING SILVER HORNET SUPERCARS (out of five).
A QUIET PLACE IN THE COUNTRY (1968, dir. Elio Petri)
ReplyDeleteA crowd-pleasing piece of cinema this is not. Actor of the day Franco Nero is in serious mode as a painter becoming more and more convinced that the ghost of a young woman is haunting the Italian villa he just purchased. He is also in an increasingly strained relationship with his girlfriend (Vanessa Redgrave) and struggling with a major artistic block. This is one of those "is it real" kind of movies, with dreams and nightmares mingling with everyday life. With this being on my watchlist for many years, I had the patience today to settle in to an arthouse experience.
The editing and the score by Ennio Morricone is very avant-garde at certain moments during the film.