'WHEN GEORGE ROMERO, STEPHEN KING AND ED HARRIS WERE YOUNG, DUMB AND FULL OF CUM[BUSTIBLE ENERGY]' EARLY 80's DOUBLE FEATURE! 081.- KNIGHTRIDERS (1981, AMAZON PRIME). Streaming on TUBI, ROKU CHANNEL, PLUTO TV, FAWESOME.
I like that Tom Savini pic. 🙃🙂
First time seeing the movie on either HD or 4K (can't tell) and with English subtitles, a luxury not present in my old Anchor Bay DVD (remember those? 🙄) which I've kept for the commentary. Ed Harris (in his first leading man role) is on fire as the leader of a tight-knit traveling troop of East Coast-based medieval stunt show performers using motorcycles instead of horses. Unwilling to compromise or sell out to corrupt local cops or 'the man' promising richer contracts and TV exposure, King Billy struggles to keep some of his more ambitious subjects from bolting for greener pastures. From the closeted gay announcer (Warner Shook's Pippin), loyal right-hand man (Gary Lahti's Alan), doctor with an etheral view of life (Brother Blue's Merlin) and grease-monkey mechanic (Christine Romero) to business-savvy Monk Tuck (John Hostetter) and the heir apparent to Billy's throne (Tom Savini's Morgan, often going face-to-face with Harris and matching him in screen presence), every tiny role in "Knightriders" is a recognizable face from the Romero cinematic universe: Ken Foree, John Amplas, Taso N. Stavrakis... even Mr. and Mrs. Stephen King in cameos.
Depending on the day I watch it or the mood I'm in, "Knightriders" is either Romero's most ambitious epic made on a shoestring budget (every cent of it on the screen), a hangout project to keep his small army of Pittsburgh-based friends employed (90-day shooting schedule! 🥵) during "Creepshow" pre-production, the most self-indulgent vanity project (2 hrs. 26 min. long! 🤯🫤) George made knowning it'd be a money loser, or a personal statement about the eternal conflict between heartfelt personal conviction versus the need to compromise to achieve financial success. It's a miracle a horror auteur like Romero was even allowed to do something this offbeat, which is what makes the fact it exists and tells a good story with compelling characters all the more remarkable. YMMV, but on this recent rewatch I'm going with 3.5 FAT COP'S HANDGUNS INSIDE THE DEEP FRIER (out of five).
I watched Knightriders as well. Loved it. There's a lot going on here. It's about the power and freedom to create your own worlds with found family. Art vs. commerce. When to make compromises and when to literally die on a hill. Is King Billy to be admired or is he a dangerous zealot? It has really stuck with me since I first saw it years ago. Oh, and seeing dudes in armor riding motorcycles is rad as hell.
"I mean it's real hard to live for something that you believe in."
082.- CREEPSHOW (1982, SHOUT! FACTORY 4K UHD). Streaming on AMC+.
Yes, Kunider, I did end up buying "Creepshow" on Scream Factory! 4K... in a collector's edition 4K steel book no less (same reduced price as the standard 4K). 😉😛
The most commercial horror movie George Romero ever directed, "Creepshow" is the motherload of American horror anthologies when it comes to talent in front (Holbrook, Nielsen, Barbeau, Marshall, Danson, Weaver, Atkins, lil' Joe Hill before he changed his name, etc.) and behind the camera (Romero directing, Stephen King writing, Tom Savini doing make-up, Richard P. Rubinstein producing, Michael Gornick's cinematography, etc.). What stood out to me from this first rewatch in years (decades?) was the absence of young teens in any of the five stories featured (six if you include the wrap-around). It feels refreshing in 2026 to watch a horror anthology about grown-ups and adults being a-holes getting their twisted just desserts. And Ed Harris, fresh off Romero's "Knightriders" the year prior, starts his Hollywood climb to success playing the second victim of zombie Nathan Grantham's (John Amplas) Father's Day cake quest. Leslie Nielsen (a techie!) and E.G. Marshall's disastrous clash with giant coprophage roaches (🤢🤮) win my personal acting MVP; the less said about Stephen King the actor in his own goofy segment the better. 🫣 4.5 $3,200-A-MONTH NYC PENTHOUSES' MONTHLY RENT (out of five).
BONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 15! 083.- THE INSPECTOR: CARTE BLANCHED (5/14/1969, KINO LORBER BLU-RAY). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
Taking care of a few cartoons I want to highlight before moving permanently to post-1975 Pink Panther business. 🙂 The last of the 34 'Inspector' theatrical shorts, "Carte Blanched" has the titular character as a fugitive-in-his-own-mind shopping cart thief, egged on by an off-screen voice (Marvin Miller) to get rid of the cart. Easier said than done, as not even throwing the darn thing off the top of the Eiffel Tower can keep the darn thing from rolling back to wherever Inspector goes. It's refreshing to have the law-enforcer become an unintended law-breaker, but this still feels like an unremarkable way to conclude a remarkably creative cartoon spinoff from the early "Pink Panther" movies' animated credits. 3.5 SIDEWALK TV SETS WITH TREMENDOUS SPEAKER SOUND EFFECTS (out of five).
084.- ROLAND AND RATTFINK: CATTLE BATTLE (8/4/1971, DVD). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
The 17th and final 'Roland and Rattfink' short has the hero trying to sing/play music, something his white horse disagrees with, while guarding cattle. Rattfink and his blue horse are the bandits trying to steal cows, something a stubborn bull refuses to let them get away with. The titular characters are on their own separate worlds until the very end, when a bomb sends one of them to be Satan's barbecue pit's personal coal shoveler and the other to sing in heaven. Talk about a finale that wraps things neat and tight. 4 EASILY-STEPPED-ON, LOWER-HALF COW DISGUISES (out of five).
085.- THE BLUE RACER: HISS AND HERS (7/3/1972, DVD). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
The first of the 17 'Blue Racer' shorts, one of two spin-offs from 1969's 'Tijuana Toads' (which I haven't seen and don't own on physical media), features a Road Runner-fast desert blue snake called 'Blue Racer' trying to catch a Japanese Beetle so he can feed his nagging wife and three baby snakes. It's a redux of the "Ant and the Aardvark" template, but with the Japanese Beetle cartoon (voiced by Tom Holland) dangerously close to racist stereotype, contrasted with Blue Racer (Larry D. Mann) sounding all-American. Decent first episode, but nothing spectacular. 3 'BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI' REFERENCES LOST TO OG TARGET AUDIENCE (out of five).
A group of film students and their war vet professor are shooting a horror movie in the woods when a zombie apocalypse begins. They decide to document their fight for survival.
Clichéd writing laced with groan-inducing dialogue, embarrassing acting, ugly 2007 CGI. Plus it's a found footage horror movie, which obviously means annoying camerawork and endless silly justifications why the characters keep the cameras going when sh1t hits the fan. There are several scenes where a zombie just ignores the guy with the camera and attacks the next closest person, just to justify getting the shot in the movie. Those made me laugh.
Season of the Witch, a.k.a. Hungry Wives, a.k.a. Jack's Wife (1972)
A middle-aged housewife feels trapped in her unhappy marriage and stagnant suburban existence. Desperate to get something more out of life, she starts dabbling in witchcraft and adultery. This movie's dark and slightly surreal vibe reminded me of Romero's similarly moody vampire meditation Martin. It's a slow burn, for sure, but the training montage of Joan diving in and trying out her new witch gear set to Donovan's "Season of the Witch" was one of the most riveting sequences I've seen this month. I just love me some witches, man.
My first revisit for the month. A classic horror anthology and perhaps one of the best anthology films period? It effortlessly balances the thruline of comic book stories with creative, funny, dark, twisted, well executed vignettes. Also its a beautiful pairing of Romero and King. Love love love this love letter to horror cinema.
Biohazard 2 (1998): As a yinzer, I have seen every Romero movie many, many times. So other than his OJ Simpson documentary and Iron City Asskickers, I had no idea what to do.
Then I remembered — I did a talking head doc about Romero’s Resident Evil project and it never got released, so why not use the research I did?
It all started when Romero directed a live-action commercial promoting the video game Resident Evil 2 in Los Angeles. The 30-second advertisement featured the game’s two main characters, Leon S. Kennedy (Brad Renfro) and Claire Redfield (Adrienne Frantz), fighting a horde of zombies while in Raccoon City’s police station. This commercial was only shown in Japan where the game is known as Biohazard 2.
Trust me — this thing looks great. A million dollar budget for 30 seconds of commercial? Amazing.
Frantz said to Variety: ““It was an honor to work with a legend like Romero,” Frantz said. “All of the zombie TV shows and movies that we see today are because of him. He started an entire horror film revolution.”
That’s true. We wouldn’t even have this video game without him, as so many of the things accepted about zombies come directly from him and his films.
Resident Evil was created by Shinji Mikami and Tokuro Fujiwara and released for the PlayStation in 1996.It is credited for defining the survival horror genre and returning zombies to popular culture. Game design started in 1993 when Capcom’s Tokuro Fujiwara told Shinji Mikami and other co-workers to create a game using elements from Fujiwara’s 1989 game Sweet Home on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Sweet Home was based on a movie that was released around the same time. The cinematic nature of Sweet Home led to Biohazard.
Capcom was so impressed with Romero’s work, it was strongly indicated that Romero would direct the first Resident Evil film. He declined at first — “I don’t wanna make another film with zombies in it, and I couldn’t make a movie based on something that ain’t mine.” He reconsidered and wrote a script for the first movie. which was eventually rejected in favor of Paul W. S. Anderson’s version.
Romero’s Resident Evil was set in the Spencer Mansion and focused on Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine. It’s a lot more faithful to the game than the Paul W.S. Anderson movies and has giant snakes, man-eating plants and mutant sharks. Barry Burton, Rebecca Chambers, Ada Wong and Albert Wesker were to also appear. Not a gamer, Romero had his assistant Jason play the game for him so he could get a feel for it.
The ending to the film would have been similar to the best ending to the first Resident Evil game. Romero even got Berni Wrightson to do artwork for Tyrant, the villain.
But sadly, Capcom producer Yoshiki Okamoto bluntly stated at the time: “Romero’s script wasn’t good, so Romero was fired.” There’s also rumor that the movie would have been NC-17 so he wasn’t picked.
Romero also said in an interview with Paul Weedon, “…this guy named Bernd Eichinger, who came in and said “No, this is not what I want.” And that was it. And he had no idea what a video game was. This is the guy that made House of the Spirits and Das Boot and he just had an impression of what he wanted the thing to be, which sort of flew in the face of all of us – Capcom and his own guys. So that was it.”
While not a gamer, Romero was smart enough to recognize that they led to the return of zombies. He said, “I do think the popularity of the creature has come from video games, not film. Zombieland was the first zombie film to break $100 million at the box office, and therefore Hollywood got interested. The remake of Dawn of the Dead did about $75 million … But dozens of hugely popular video games have had a bigger impact.”
'WHEN GEORGE ROMERO, STEPHEN KING AND ED HARRIS WERE YOUNG, DUMB AND FULL OF CUM[BUSTIBLE ENERGY]' EARLY 80's DOUBLE FEATURE!
ReplyDelete081.- KNIGHTRIDERS (1981, AMAZON PRIME). Streaming on TUBI, ROKU CHANNEL, PLUTO TV, FAWESOME.
I like that Tom Savini pic. 🙃🙂
First time seeing the movie on either HD or 4K (can't tell) and with English subtitles, a luxury not present in my old Anchor Bay DVD (remember those? 🙄) which I've kept for the commentary. Ed Harris (in his first leading man role) is on fire as the leader of a tight-knit traveling troop of East Coast-based medieval stunt show performers using motorcycles instead of horses. Unwilling to compromise or sell out to corrupt local cops or 'the man' promising richer contracts and TV exposure, King Billy struggles to keep some of his more ambitious subjects from bolting for greener pastures. From the closeted gay announcer (Warner Shook's Pippin), loyal right-hand man (Gary Lahti's Alan), doctor with an etheral view of life (Brother Blue's Merlin) and grease-monkey mechanic (Christine Romero) to business-savvy Monk Tuck (John Hostetter) and the heir apparent to Billy's throne (Tom Savini's Morgan, often going face-to-face with Harris and matching him in screen presence), every tiny role in "Knightriders" is a recognizable face from the Romero cinematic universe: Ken Foree, John Amplas, Taso N. Stavrakis... even Mr. and Mrs. Stephen King in cameos.
Depending on the day I watch it or the mood I'm in, "Knightriders" is either Romero's most ambitious epic made on a shoestring budget (every cent of it on the screen), a hangout project to keep his small army of Pittsburgh-based friends employed (90-day shooting schedule! 🥵) during "Creepshow" pre-production, the most self-indulgent vanity project (2 hrs. 26 min. long! 🤯🫤) George made knowning it'd be a money loser, or a personal statement about the eternal conflict between heartfelt personal conviction versus the need to compromise to achieve financial success. It's a miracle a horror auteur like Romero was even allowed to do something this offbeat, which is what makes the fact it exists and tells a good story with compelling characters all the more remarkable. YMMV, but on this recent rewatch I'm going with 3.5 FAT COP'S HANDGUNS INSIDE THE DEEP FRIER (out of five).
I watched Knightriders as well. Loved it. There's a lot going on here. It's about the power and freedom to create your own worlds with found family. Art vs. commerce. When to make compromises and when to literally die on a hill. Is King Billy to be admired or is he a dangerous zealot? It has really stuck with me since I first saw it years ago. Oh, and seeing dudes in armor riding motorcycles is rad as hell.
Delete"I mean it's real hard to live for something that you believe in."
082.- CREEPSHOW (1982, SHOUT! FACTORY 4K UHD). Streaming on AMC+.
ReplyDeleteYes, Kunider, I did end up buying "Creepshow" on Scream Factory! 4K... in a collector's edition 4K steel book no less (same reduced price as the standard 4K). 😉😛
The most commercial horror movie George Romero ever directed, "Creepshow" is the motherload of American horror anthologies when it comes to talent in front (Holbrook, Nielsen, Barbeau, Marshall, Danson, Weaver, Atkins, lil' Joe Hill before he changed his name, etc.) and behind the camera (Romero directing, Stephen King writing, Tom Savini doing make-up, Richard P. Rubinstein producing, Michael Gornick's cinematography, etc.). What stood out to me from this first rewatch in years (decades?) was the absence of young teens in any of the five stories featured (six if you include the wrap-around). It feels refreshing in 2026 to watch a horror anthology about grown-ups and adults being a-holes getting their twisted just desserts. And Ed Harris, fresh off Romero's "Knightriders" the year prior, starts his Hollywood climb to success playing the second victim of zombie Nathan Grantham's (John Amplas) Father's Day cake quest. Leslie Nielsen (a techie!) and E.G. Marshall's disastrous clash with giant coprophage roaches (🤢🤮) win my personal acting MVP; the less said about Stephen King the actor in his own goofy segment the better. 🫣 4.5 $3,200-A-MONTH NYC PENTHOUSES' MONTHLY RENT (out of five).
Good man 😜😎
DeleteBONUS: 30 DAYS OF PINK PANTHER & FRIENDS, DAY 15!
ReplyDelete083.- THE INSPECTOR: CARTE BLANCHED (5/14/1969, KINO LORBER BLU-RAY). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
Taking care of a few cartoons I want to highlight before moving permanently to post-1975 Pink Panther business. 🙂 The last of the 34 'Inspector' theatrical shorts, "Carte Blanched" has the titular character as a fugitive-in-his-own-mind shopping cart thief, egged on by an off-screen voice (Marvin Miller) to get rid of the cart. Easier said than done, as not even throwing the darn thing off the top of the Eiffel Tower can keep the darn thing from rolling back to wherever Inspector goes. It's refreshing to have the law-enforcer become an unintended law-breaker, but this still feels like an unremarkable way to conclude a remarkably creative cartoon spinoff from the early "Pink Panther" movies' animated credits. 3.5 SIDEWALK TV SETS WITH TREMENDOUS SPEAKER SOUND EFFECTS (out of five).
084.- ROLAND AND RATTFINK: CATTLE BATTLE (8/4/1971, DVD). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
DeleteThe 17th and final 'Roland and Rattfink' short has the hero trying to sing/play music, something his white horse disagrees with, while guarding cattle. Rattfink and his blue horse are the bandits trying to steal cows, something a stubborn bull refuses to let them get away with. The titular characters are on their own separate worlds until the very end, when a bomb sends one of them to be Satan's barbecue pit's personal coal shoveler and the other to sing in heaven. Talk about a finale that wraps things neat and tight. 4 EASILY-STEPPED-ON, LOWER-HALF COW DISGUISES (out of five).
085.- THE BLUE RACER: HISS AND HERS (7/3/1972, DVD). Streaming on YOUTUBE.
DeleteThe first of the 17 'Blue Racer' shorts, one of two spin-offs from 1969's 'Tijuana Toads' (which I haven't seen and don't own on physical media), features a Road Runner-fast desert blue snake called 'Blue Racer' trying to catch a Japanese Beetle so he can feed his nagging wife and three baby snakes. It's a redux of the "Ant and the Aardvark" template, but with the Japanese Beetle cartoon (voiced by Tom Holland) dangerously close to racist stereotype, contrasted with Blue Racer (Larry D. Mann) sounding all-American. Decent first episode, but nothing spectacular. 3 'BRIDGE ON THE RIVER KWAI' REFERENCES LOST TO OG TARGET AUDIENCE (out of five).
Diary of the Dead (2007, dir. George A. Romero)
ReplyDeleteA group of film students and their war vet professor are shooting a horror movie in the woods when a zombie apocalypse begins. They decide to document their fight for survival.
Clichéd writing laced with groan-inducing dialogue, embarrassing acting, ugly 2007 CGI. Plus it's a found footage horror movie, which obviously means annoying camerawork and endless silly justifications why the characters keep the cameras going when sh1t hits the fan. There are several scenes where a zombie just ignores the guy with the camera and attacks the next closest person, just to justify getting the shot in the movie. Those made me laugh.
Bad.
Season of the Witch, a.k.a. Hungry Wives, a.k.a. Jack's Wife (1972)
ReplyDeleteA middle-aged housewife feels trapped in her unhappy marriage and stagnant suburban existence. Desperate to get something more out of life, she starts dabbling in witchcraft and adultery. This movie's dark and slightly surreal vibe reminded me of Romero's similarly moody vampire meditation Martin. It's a slow burn, for sure, but the training montage of Joan diving in and trying out her new witch gear set to Donovan's "Season of the Witch" was one of the most riveting sequences I've seen this month. I just love me some witches, man.
Creepshow (1982)
ReplyDeleteMy first revisit for the month. A classic horror anthology and perhaps one of the best anthology films period? It effortlessly balances the thruline of comic book stories with creative, funny, dark, twisted, well executed vignettes. Also its a beautiful pairing of Romero and King. Love love love this love letter to horror cinema.
Biohazard 2 (1998): As a yinzer, I have seen every Romero movie many, many times. So other than his OJ Simpson documentary and Iron City Asskickers, I had no idea what to do.
ReplyDeleteThen I remembered — I did a talking head doc about Romero’s Resident Evil project and it never got released, so why not use the research I did?
It all started when Romero directed a live-action commercial promoting the video game Resident Evil 2 in Los Angeles. The 30-second advertisement featured the game’s two main characters, Leon S. Kennedy (Brad Renfro) and Claire Redfield (Adrienne Frantz), fighting a horde of zombies while in Raccoon City’s police station. This commercial was only shown in Japan where the game is known as Biohazard 2.
Trust me — this thing looks great. A million dollar budget for 30 seconds of commercial? Amazing.
Frantz said to Variety: ““It was an honor to work with a legend like Romero,” Frantz said. “All of the zombie TV shows and movies that we see today are because of him. He started an entire horror film revolution.”
That’s true. We wouldn’t even have this video game without him, as so many of the things accepted about zombies come directly from him and his films.
Resident Evil was created by Shinji Mikami and Tokuro Fujiwara and released for the PlayStation in 1996.It is credited for defining the survival horror genre and returning zombies to popular culture. Game design started in 1993 when Capcom’s Tokuro Fujiwara told Shinji Mikami and other co-workers to create a game using elements from Fujiwara’s 1989 game Sweet Home on the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Sweet Home was based on a movie that was released around the same time. The cinematic nature of Sweet Home led to Biohazard.
Capcom was so impressed with Romero’s work, it was strongly indicated that Romero would direct the first Resident Evil film. He declined at first — “I don’t wanna make another film with zombies in it, and I couldn’t make a movie based on something that ain’t mine.” He reconsidered and wrote a script for the first movie. which was eventually rejected in favor of Paul W. S. Anderson’s version.
Romero’s Resident Evil was set in the Spencer Mansion and focused on Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine. It’s a lot more faithful to the game than the Paul W.S. Anderson movies and has giant snakes, man-eating plants and mutant sharks. Barry Burton, Rebecca Chambers, Ada Wong and Albert Wesker were to also appear. Not a gamer, Romero had his assistant Jason play the game for him so he could get a feel for it.
The ending to the film would have been similar to the best ending to the first Resident Evil game. Romero even got Berni Wrightson to do artwork for Tyrant, the villain.
But sadly, Capcom producer Yoshiki Okamoto bluntly stated at the time: “Romero’s script wasn’t good, so Romero was fired.” There’s also rumor that the movie would have been NC-17 so he wasn’t picked.
Romero also said in an interview with Paul Weedon, “…this guy named Bernd Eichinger, who came in and said “No, this is not what I want.” And that was it. And he had no idea what a video game was. This is the guy that made House of the Spirits and Das Boot and he just had an impression of what he wanted the thing to be, which sort of flew in the face of all of us – Capcom and his own guys. So that was it.”
While not a gamer, Romero was smart enough to recognize that they led to the return of zombies. He said, “I do think the popularity of the creature has come from video games, not film. Zombieland was the first zombie film to break $100 million at the box office, and therefore Hollywood got interested. The remake of Dawn of the Dead did about $75 million … But dozens of hugely popular video games have had a bigger impact.”